I'm a huge loser.
I like horror stuff.
I have a terrible sense of humor
I like to show off my tattoos.
I love cats.
I'm a Hairstylist.
I need feminism.
"Real women do not have curves. Real women do not look like
just one thing.
Real women have curves, and not. They are tall, and
not. They are brown-skinned, and olive-skinned, and not. They
have small breasts, and big ones, and no breasts whatsoever.
Real women start their lives as baby girls. And as baby
boys. And as babies of indeterminate biological sex whose
bodies terrify their doctors and families into making all kinds of
very sudden decisions.
Real women have big hands and small hands and long
elegant fingers and short stubby fingers and manicures and
broken nails with dirt under them.
Real women have armpit hair and leg hair and pubic
hair and facial hair and chest hair and sexy moustaches and full,
luxuriant beards. Real women have none of these things,
spontaneously or as the result of intentional change. Real
women are bald as eggs, by chance and by choice and by
chemo. Real women have hair so long they can sit on it. Real
women wear wigs and weaves and extensions and kufi and dorags and hairnets and hijab and headscarves and hats and
yarmulkes and textured rubber swim caps with the plastic
flowers on the sides.
Real women wear high heels and skirts. Or not.
Real women are feminine and smell good and they are
masculine and smell good and they are androgynous and smell
good, except when they don’t smell so good, but that can be
changed if desired because real women change stuff when they
want to.
Real women have ovaries. Unless they don’t, and
sometimes they don’t because they were born that way and sometimes they don’t because they had to have their ovaries
removed. Real women have uteruses, unless they don’t, see
above. Real women have vaginas and clitorises and XX sex
chromosomes and high estrogen levels, they ovulate and
menstruate and can get pregnant and have babies. Except
sometimes not, for a rather spectacular array of reasons both
spontaneous and induced.
Real women are fat. And thin. And both, and neither,
and otherwise. Doesn’t make them any less real.
There is a phrase I wish I could engrave upon the hearts
of every single person, everywhere in the world, and it is this
sentence which comes from the genius lips of the grand and
eloquent Mr. Glenn Marla:
There is no wrong way to have a body.
I’m going to say it again because it’s important: There is no
wrong way to have a body.
And if your moral compass points in any way, shape, or
form to equality, you need to get this through your thick skull
and stop with the “real women are like such-and-so” crap.
You are not the authority on what “real” human beings
are, and who qualifies as “real” and on what basis. All human
beings are real.
Yes, I know you’re tired of feeling disenfranchised. It is
a tiresome and loathsome thing to be and to feel. But the tit-fortat disenfranchisement of others is not going to solve that
problem. Solidarity has to start somewhere and it might as well
be with you and me."
Hanne Blank


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